Adult Children impacted by the disease of Addiction in their families while growing up, otherwise known as ACOAs often carry the weight of deeply ingrained struggles with self-image, stemming from years of criticism or unattainable expectations about their appearance or performance. Many COAs grew up being judged for their weight, looks, acne, or even their athletic or academic abilities. This hyperfocus on outward perfection can leave lasting scars, making it difficult to fully embrace self-love and acceptance as they grow older.
As aging naturally brings changes to physical appearance, these challenges can resurface. The pressure to maintain a perfect exterior may feel overwhelming, leading some ACOAs to obsess over modifying their looks to align with unrealistic standards. The pressure to maintain a perfect exterior is compounded by societal and media influences as well. This can hinder their ability to appreciate the beauty of who they are beyond the surface.
This New Year let’s encourage children of all ages to embrace their authentic selves and honor the incredible bodies that have carried them through life. Aging is a testament to survival, resilience, and growth—not something to be feared or hidden. Instead of striving for perfection, let’s celebrate the unique beauty of the body that has helped you:
• Survive difficult experiences
• Build strength and resilience
• Develop the coping skills that empower you today
Cultivating Self-Love and Acceptance
1. Shift Your Focus Recognize the strength and capability of your body rather than its imperfections. Celebrate how it has carried you through challenges and helped you grow.
2. Practice Gratitude Each day, acknowledge one thing you appreciate about yourself—whether it’s your kindness, your perseverance, or your favorite physical feature.
3. Reject Unrealistic Standards Surround yourself with positive influences, such as media and friends that value authenticity over perfection.
4. Seek Support If lingering self-image struggles feel overwhelming, consider working with a therapist who understands the unique challenges of COAs.
5. Embrace Aging View aging not as a loss, but as a marker of the wisdom, resilience, and experiences that have shaped you into the person you are today.
A Celebration of You
In 2025, let’s collectively redefine beauty and perfection. It’s not about flawless exteriors but about the courage, strength, and compassion you embody.
An important way to do this all year long is through affirmation. NACoA provides affirmations each Monday on social media. Follow one of the social media channels where these are posted – Facebook, Twitter, Linked In, and Instagram – and read the weekly motivation. Reflect on the message. Remember the Seven Cs apply to everyone impacted by the disease of addiction in their families, regardless of age, and ultimately remind us that we are worthy of self-care and celebration!
Here’s to loving yourself as you are, honoring the incredible journey you’ve been on, and stepping into the New Year with grace, confidence, and self-acceptance.
You are enough, just as you are.
